- Instead of what, try thinking of the why.
- Having an attitude of gratitude changes your outlook on life.
- Becoming more open to change is one of the most life changing things you can do.
Life moves quickly these days, and we often get so caught up in the day-to-day that we forget to pause. So, before we uncover the 12 life coaching steps to becoming the best version of you, take a moment to reflect on these 3 life coaching questions:
In this moment, do I feel like the best version of myself?
If I were the best version of myself today, what would that look like?
How would my life be different if I was showing up as the best version of myself?
These are some thought-provoking questions that can give you an indication as to whether you are on track and aligned with your best self. We have all had moments in our life where things were not going as planned, or we felt like our life was completely off course. The good news is it’s fixable. It doesn’t matter where you are or what you have accomplished, you have the ability change your life. So, if you are looking to become the best version of yourself, keep reading! The following 12 steps will create an impactful mindset shift, that will change your life for the better.
1. Know and invest in yourself
We’ve all felt “stuck” at some point in our lives. It’s that gut feeling that says something isn’t quite right; there’s got to be more to life than this?
When we try to get “unstuck,” we often think of what we want in life. Instead of what, try thinking of the why. Understanding why you want a marketing job, why you want to make X amount of money a year, or why you want a relationship. This will give you a new sense of perspective and will reveal what is truly important to you.
When you get in touch with your wants and needs, you can invest in yourself by doing more of the things that align with your values and passions and start removing the things that don’t. For example, if you love being outdoors because it makes you feel calm and relaxed, invest in yourself by carving out time every day to spend more time outdoors.
2. Be kind
The power of kindness never ceases to amaze me. When you live your life with kindness, you will be astonished at the opportunities and experiences that come your way.
Kindness opens doors, both literally and figuratively. A simple gesture, like holding a door open for someone, can change a person’s day. But what most people don’t realize is that it can change your day too! When you shift to being more community-focused and operate your life with kindness, it will become a habit that can truly change you and your life. Being kind to yourself is just as important as being kind to others. Treat yourself with kindness, just as you would anyone else.
3. Attitude of gratitude
Having an attitude of gratitude changes your outlook on life. When you recognize and appreciate every gift in your life, things start to change. You will see more and more of these gifts, and you will find you have so much to be grateful for. For example, if you have internet access that enables you to read this post, shelter over your head, and food in your belly – you have a lot to be grateful for! As humans, we tend to focus more on the negative and less on the positive. Fortunately, you can reprogram your brain with a bit of practice, and begin to shift your perspective. Each night before bed, write down three things you are grateful for. Review it in the morning before you start your day and watch your mindset shift to an attitude of gratitude!
4. Be open to change
Change is tough for many people, so don’t feel bad if you shy away from it. Becoming more open to change is one of the most life changing things you can do. Anything worth achieving in life often comes with a bit of work and lots of change. Whether it’s changing cities to find a new job, changing the way you communicate with your partner, or changing the way you talk to yourself – embrace it. You may be surprised at how your life changes for the better. Start by making small changes more regularly. You will become more and more comfortable with change the more you practice it, and eventually, you’ll be feeling bold and ready to tackle on new challenges with confidence!
5. Listen to learn and understand
Have you ever had a conversation with someone, where you can tell they are listening to respond, and not to understand? If you’re pouring your heart out about an issue, it can be so disappointing if the only response you get is a personal anecdote of what happened to them or their version of events.
The next time you’re discussing an issue with someone, whether it’s a friend, colleague or family member, approach the conversation with the goal of learning and understanding. Actively listen, ask questions, and take the time to hear them out. You will notice an incredible shift in how you respond to conflict and challenges while also strengthening the relationships in your life.
6. Help others
At some point in our lives, we will all need the help of others. At other points, we are the ones in a position to help. Helping others can improve your life in many ways. It can provide you with a new perspective and better outlook, it will build your support network, and you will feel good knowing you made a difference. There are countless ways you can help others. You can volunteer at a soup kitchen, cook a hot meal for your friend who’s going through a tough time, or mow your elderly neighbors lawn. Lending a helping hand does not need to take a lot of time or money. The simplest gestures can make the world of a difference for someone in need. Sending a “thinking of you” text to a friend or donating $10 to a winter clothing fund can improve your mood, while changing someone’s day for the better.
7. Eliminate fear and negative self-talk
Think about this: what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail? Would you start your own business or pursue an entirely different career path? The fear of failing stops so many of us from pursuing our dreams and passions. Think of it this way, F.E.A.R stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.
Our fears are often rooted in negative self-talk and are not based on fact! How often do you tell yourself you can’t do this, you are not enough, you aren’t smart enough, you don’t have enough money or enough connections… this negative self-talk can go on and on and does not serve you!
Commit to focusing on what you love about yourself. What are you great at? What sets you apart from others? What makes you unique? Being mindful of your negative self-talk can give you the confidence you need to jump in and pursue your dreams.
8. Practice daily mental and physical healthy habits
Start incorporating healthy habits into your daily routines. It’s best to start small so you will be consistent with your new routines. For example, you could set a goal to start each day with a 15-minute walk. This is a manageable goal that you can incorporate without any major life changes. 15 minutes may not sound like much, but once you get started you may find you enjoy it, and a 15-minute walk can turn into 30 minutes!
You can also incorporate a morning mediation, prayer, or journaling activity into your morning routine. These practices will help set the tone for the day and get you into the right mindset. There are countless options to strengthen your mind and body with healthy habits. In the beginning, you will have to make a conscious effort to do these things, but within a month, they will become habits and beloved parts of your daily routine.
9. Own your power
You are enough! You are enough right now, at this very moment. You are capable of so much, and you have the power to change your life! Repeat the affirmation “I am enough” while looking in the mirror. Look directly in your eyes and say this at least 5 times. Do this daily, each morning before starting your day. Owning your power means living your life with the realization that you can achieve incredible things in your life. It means you own your decisions, your choices, and you consciously create the best version of you, no matter what.
10. Step out of your comfort zone
To become the best version of yourself, you will have to step out of your comfort zone! Let’s say you want a loving romantic relationship. You’ve tried to meet someone at Church, your volunteer group, and through friends, but it just hasn’t worked. Try stepping out of your comfort zone and join a club or attend a virtual networking event. With COVID-19, it can be challenging to get out and meet new people. Online dating platforms might be out of your comfort zone, but they will allow you to chat with new people and get to know someone through text messages, phone calls and video chat. When we try something new and are open to different experiences, we can enjoy everything life has to offer. You never know who you will meet and why. Get out there and leave your comfort zone behind.
11. Embrace the power of forgiveness
There’s a saying that says goes, “forgiveness can’t change your past, but it can change your future.” Forgiving yourself and others will create more mental and emotional space by freeing you from the burdens of anger, resentment, and regret. Forgiveness can improve your relationships, reduce anxiety, strengthen your immune system, improve self-esteem, and more.
12. Live in the present
Many people spend a significant amount of time living in the past, remembering better days or reliving regrets. Alternatively, many people spend time dreaming of the future, thinking “my life will be good when…” or “I will be happy when…”. The real magic of life happens in the present moment. Living in the present has several benefits for your mental and physical well-being. Meditation is a great way to practice mindfulness, and bringing your conscious awareness back into the present moment. The next time you sit down to have a meal, don’t think of what happened at work earlier in the day or your mounting to-do list. Instead, focus on your food, the taste, smell, colors, and even texture in your mouth. You will begin to enjoy life with a whole new perspective.
These 12 steps will help you align with your purpose and create a mindset shift that allows you to become the best version of yourself. In a sense, they will remove the fog that clouds your vision and prevents you from reaching your potential. When you live your life as your best self, you’ll inspire others to do the same.